How to Be An Awesome Writer When You Aren’t Writing

Lets get this straight from jumpstreet. The only time you shouldn’t be writing is when you’re sleeping or dead (and no, showering is no excuse, you lazy turd. Ever hear of waterproof pens?!?).

If that is, you are a flawless FUEL INJECTED TURBO CHARGED WORD SPEWING MACHINE. If you are, good for you. Asshole.

But you’re not. You’re a broke-down hoopdie with a bad carburator and a droopy tailpipe. It’s why you’re here, hiding out from the writing matrons in your head like moody Goth teenagers behind the high school gym. Continue reading

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